I titled my blog “All Out War!” because when I started it, I felt as if I’d come off the battlefield, plain and simple. Of course, it’s easy to feel that way about our own lives, our own battles, our own skirmishes, but isn’t every life composed of the same kinds of battles? We think we’re the only ones going through a particular thing, and at times feel so lonely that the only solution seems to be to wave that white flag, or even worse sometimes, crawl under a rock or into a deep, dark, abysmal hole and just never come out again.
But when WE are the ones going through it, it truly does feel as if we’re all alone…
I have had my battles, that’s for sure, and could probably write a book about each and every one. I’ve had battles with my parents when I was young (and thought they were “so unfair”), battles with friends and co-workers, I’ve battled drugs and alcohol, I’ve battled depression and the spirit of suicide, and the list could go on and on and on. In each and every situation, one fact holds true… were it not for God, I would never have made it. He has been my ever present help in times of trouble, even when I was emotionally kicking and screaming like a two year old in my mind. He’s never left me, and I’ve always found His Word to be true, down to the very last tidbit. I’ve fallen away from Him, I’ve attempted to find solutions to life’s problems – however unsuccessfully – on my own, and I’ve sworn that He had left me to sink in the mire of my own stupid choices more than once. But we often think we have things figured out, and these assumptions, like so many others we make over the course of a lifetime, simply were not true! And I’m so glad.
More than once, I have realized that Proverbs 14:12 is true… “There is a way which seemeth right unto a man, but the end thereof are the ways of death.” (KJV). It doesn’t mean that if you take the way that seems right, you will die physically; it’s talking about a spiritual death, the one – in my humble opinion – that leads straight to a path of depression, anxiety, all sorts of mental ailments that make you doubt your self-worth and reasons for being and so much more. There’s so much that we simply don’t need to bear, but that we shoulder up willingly, more often than not, unknowingly, when the One who is able to lift the burden is just waiting for us to give it to Him and move on.
I’m thankful that He has been there for me and lifted me out of many a self-made pit. I’m thankful that He is a giver of second chances. And I will do all that I can to please Him and tell what He has done for me.